(April Fools)Review: MEGA BLOKS Warcraft Colton & RAGEROCK

April 1, 2014 | 9

UPDATE: Hope everyone realized that this was an April Fools joke. The blog design isn’t a joke though and I hope you like the new and improved look!

Hello everyone! You must be wondering, what is up with the sick new blog design??

I’ve been wanting to change the blog design and at least attempt at making Jay’s Brick Blog look a little prettier and I decided to pull the trigger and finally take the time to redesign my blog. It’s not just a cosmetic change too, there are heaps of changes under the hood and I think it’s about time to make a huge announcement.

JAY’S BRICK BLOG WILL BE SWITCHING OVER TO COVERAGE OF MEGA BLOKS, THE SUPERIOR CONSTRUCTION TOY.

Yup, you read that right. I have finally seen the light that LEGO is the inferior building blocks system and will proudly be throwing my support behind the Canadian toy juggernaut, Mega Bloks. After doing my homework on such legitimate websites like www.legosucks.com and www.megabloksrulz.com, I’m 100% certain that Mega Bloks is the toy of the future and I will present my case via my very first (but not last!) Mega Bloks review of Colton and RAGEROCK, two small sets from the World of Warcraft Theme

Firstly, Mega Bloks has the license to the most popular massively multiplayer online role playing game (MMORPG) of all time, World of Warcraft. Personally, I played WoW since Vanilla in 2004 all the way to The Burning Crusade so I know my Jaina Proudmoores from my Alleria Windrangers. World of Warcraft is a SUPER COOL theme to have, because you get to play with Orcs, Humans and other fantasy creatures. Way cooler than pansy themes like LEGO Harry Potter or Spiderman. Just look at how bad-ass these boxes are.

You know why Mega Bloks are better than LEGO? No one buys them, so they ALWAYS go on clearance. I paid like 5 bucks for these cause they were discounted even further because no one wanted to pay $10 for their original clearance prices. WIN. No more having to spend hundreds on inferior LEGO sets when I can get Mega Bloks for so much cheaper.

Check out the contents of the box. You know Mega Bloks are the premium brand because they come with that sweet plastic packaging. Who cares about dwindling resources and plastic being incredibly hard to break down when your toys are needlessly stuffed into these plastic moulds. They just scream luxury.

No idea what these guys are called and since LEGO already has the monopoly on minifigures, I’m going to dub them MEGA-figures, because they pack MEGA value and MEGA coolness. Look at the awesome details, sloppy paint job and super cool weapons.

I like that the Mega Bloks designers incorporated extreme humility and modestness into the MEGAFIGURES by making them slightly flawed. I think that’s a great sign as these toys send out the signal that they are down to Earth and flawed, just like you and me. This makes it so much easier to relate to them. Look at Colton’s crazy cross eyed stare. Beautifully flawless.

Side by side with puny and pathetic LEGO minifigures. Seriously, why would you want to buy any LEGO? They look so LAME next to these mighty MEGAFIGURES.

Mega Bloks really encourage you to be creative when playing with them. Look at how creative I am. I switched Colton’s head onto RAGEROCK’S.

IF you’re not content with switching heads, you can even do all sorts of wacky things like popping heads into their arm slots and put hands into their head slots. HOW COOL IS THAT. Imagine the millions of creative possibilities that lie out there. My brain hurts just thinking about it. What a creative toy. Try doing that with LEGO. Oh wait, you can’t! #REKT

Behold, the masterpiece I created.

You know how LEGO fans are ALWAYS whining about the amount of stickers they have to put up with? Not a problem with Mega Bloks. Look at these sweet printed Horde and Alliance tiles!

LEGO is fairly secretive about what parts they manufacture in China, but Mega Bloks has the audacity and transparency to just print it on their bricks so you are 100% certain where their blocks come from. China is a rising superpower and I would love it if more of the things we use on a daily basis come from the Oriental Utopia.

I also love how they mix up their logos just to keep things interesting. Who needs consistency when you can either imprint your logo in between bricks or on the studs as you please. Variety is the spice of life!

Check out this awesome creation that I made from Colton’s set. Did I mention how poseable and flexible these MEGAFIGURES are?

Here’s RAGEROCK on his ROCK thingy. I love how menacing and terrifying RAGEROCK looks with his bright purple sword. All these cost $5 each. Look at all that value! For $5, you only get one lousy minifig in a blind bag.

In conclusion, I gotta say that I was absolutely blown away by the quality and marvelous joy that I received when putting these sets together. It really shows how behind LEGO is as a toy company and their weakness in pandering towards children while ignoring adults is obvious. Everyone knows you want to build awesome World of Warcraft things. Much more than say…Minecraft. Eww.

I took this photo as a symbolic message of the direction of my blog. I have seen the error of my ways and I have prostrated myself before my new Mega Bloks overlords.

I am excited about what the future holds and will definitely pick up way more Mega Bloks sets when they inevitably go on clearance. Seriously, they’re like the best kept toy secrets, because no one takes them seriously! It’s an obvious plot hatched by the Illuminati when they spread their propaganda about how LEGO is better than Mega Bloks. Say no to the New World Order and support the good guys (Mega Bloks) in the fight against pretentious unnecessarily high quality toys.

Most of you will find this hard to stomach but I am confident that you will see the light when you play and hurt your fingers on the enlighteningly sharp edges of Mega Bloks bricks.

Till then, happy building and Happy April Fools Day!